The twelve competencies of emotional intelligence

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According to Daniel Goleman, internationally known psychologist and author of Emotional Intelligence, Social Intelligence, and Working with Emotional Intelligence; Emotional Self Awareness is the ability to know your own emotions and their effects on your performance and it involves 12 competencies:

• Self-Regulate is the ability to keep your disruptive emotions and impulses in check in order to maintain your effectiveness under stressful or even hostile conditions. 
• Positivity is the ability to see the best in people, situations, and events so you can be persistent in pursuing goals despite setbacks and obstacles. 
• Achieve means that you strive to meet or exceed a standard of excellence by embracing challenges, taking calculated risks and looking for ways to do things better.
• Adaptability means you can stay focused on your goals, but easily adjust how you get there. You remain flexible in the face of change can juggle multiple demands, and are open to new situations, ideas or innovative approaches. 
• Empathy means you have the ability to sense others’ feelings; have a desire to understand how they see things; and take an active interest in their concerns. 
• Organizational Awareness is the ability to read a group’s emotional currents and power relationships, identifying influencers, networks, and the dynamics that matter in decision-making. 
• Influence refers to the ability to have a positive impact on others and meaningfully engage people in order to get buy-in or gain their support. 
• Coach is the ability to further the learning or development of others by understanding their goals, challenging them, giving them timely feedback, and offering them support. 
• Inspire is the ability to bring your best and motivate others around a shared mission or purpose in order to get the job done.
• Teamwork is the ability to work with others toward a shared goal; build spirit and positive relationships; encourage active participation; and share responsibility and rewards among members of a group.
• Conflict Management is the ability to work through tense or highly charged situations by tactfully bringing disagreements into the open, seeking to understand multiple perspectives, and searching for common ground in order to find solutions people can agree to.

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Delegation

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There are basically two kinds of delegation: “gofer delegation” and “stewardship delegation.”

Gofer delegation means “Go for this, go for that, do this, do that, and tell me when it’s done.” Most people who are producers have a gofer delegation paradigm. They are the producers. They roll up their sleeves and get the job done. If they are given a position of supervision or management, they still think like producers. They don’t know how to set up a full delegation so that another person is committed to achieving results. Because they are focused on methods, they become responsible for the results.

There’s a much better way, a more effective way to delegate to other people. And it’s based on a paradigm of appreciation of self-awareness, the imagination, the conscience, and the free will of other people.

Stewardship delegation is focused on results instead of methods. It gives people a choice of method and makes them responsible for results. It takes more time in the beginning, but it’s time well invested. You can move the fulcrum over, you can increase your leverage, through stewardship delegation. Stewardship delegation involves clear, up-front mutual understanding and commitment regarding expectations in five areas.

• DESIRED RESULTS. Create a clear, mutual understanding of what needs to be accomplished, focusing on what, not how; results, not methods.
• GUIDELINES. Identify the parameters within which the individual should operate.
• RESOURCES. Identify the human, financial, technical, or organizational resources the person can draw on to accomplish the desired results.
• ACCOUNTABILITY. Set up the standards of performance that will be used in evaluating the results and the specific times when reporting and evaluation will take place.
• CONSEQUENCES. Specify what will happen, both good and bad, as a result of the evaluation.

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You don’t have my permission

Leadership should mean giving control rather than taking control and creating leaders rather than forging followers.

David Marquet, Author of Turn The Ship Around

Turn the Ship Around! is the true story of David Marquet. Struggling against his own instincts to take control, he instead achieved the vastly more powerful model of giving control.

“May I?” pushes all the power and responsibility to the person granting the permission. “I’m going to” squarely puts the responsibility on the person who’s going to carry out the action. When the person doing the work is the person that has to live with the consequences, they tend to think more completely about what they’re about to do. They see it from more angles, they consider it differently, they’re more thoughtful about it because it’s ultimately on them. When you don’t have permission, it’s on you to make the call.